Need a passport?

Most of the time, Jeff and I feel like it was a really good decision to move to the South. However, a few times over the past couple weeks, we are look at each other and are like, (in relation to a conversation with someone else) WHHHHHHAAAAAT????? I so cannot believe you just said that to me.

And because of such recent events in our lives - one being NASCAR in Atlanta a couple weekends ago, another being "You Lie" from our neighboring state to the north, and yet another thing being our local nightly news and the crazy stories that happen down here - I keep getting the impression that we are sometimes living in a different country. Because seriously, the culture is FAR different than the midwest.

Time to break out the new virus top news story...not H1N1 but UR1HTR (hat tip to Lea Lane http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lea-lane/the-ur1htr-virus-hate-flu_b_285797.html)
Her thoughts (but I have edited a few things) ~

The ever-present UR1HTR virus (also called "hate flu" or "Republican flu") has been spreading rapidly since November, 2008.

Heavily Infected Areas
The hate flu seems to thrive in the southern United States, with pockets found throughout the country, especially in rural areas. The Republican Party, especially its southern congressional delegation, is already suffering an epidemic. Being around those infected with the virus carries special risk, especially in the very young, the vulnerable, the mentally challenged and the uninformed.

Symptoms
UR1HTR virus symptoms include irrational hatred of people of color (especially those in positions of power), Jews, New Yorkers and all things French. Other symptoms include loss of brain cells, aversion to facts -- especially scientific ones, minimal empathy, frequent invoking of God and the Second Amendment, chanting of slogans, love of NASCAR and World Wrestling Federation, screaming, fear of change, and hypocrisy.

Secondary symptoms include demonizing "the unfamiliar" or "other," linear thinking, weird hats, hooded sheets in the closet, lack of humor (except for The Cable Guy, Dennis Miller, and stale jokes about a priest, a rabbi, and a black man).

Those infected with the UR1HTR virus tend to gather (Sept. 12 rally, town halls) where the virus spreads rapidly and infects others through media enabling. Disruptions (bitten fingers at town meetings) and Tourette-like statements ("He's an Arab") are common.

While the UR1HTR virus cannot be yet eradicated, virus victims have been known to make a fast recovery when something awful happens to them so that government intervention is needed, or if they travel to France and enjoy the snails.

At Special Risk
Children, older people, independents, family members of those infected, and those who: talk about religion excessively and /or are fundamentalists, have never left the country (or worse, the county), would benefit most from government programs, or do not have a college education.

Those With Natural Immunity
Democrats, Union members, persons of color, atheists or agnostics, the over-educated, and travelers to more than 10 countries seem to maintain life-long immunity to the hate virus.

Boosters for Those Without Immunity
While there is no cure, the following seems to offer some protection against the virus: Michael Moore movies, Bill Maher, Keith Olbermann, Rachel Maddow, NPR, and Jon Stewart.

Important Request
Please spread this information about the UR1HATER virus to help stop the spread. It is especially important to thwart the virus before November, 2010.